DavidVandeVelde.com

Jack came to see me and he was neither nimble or quick.

Instead of clearing a candle, he tripped on his walking stick.

He said "I didn't grow old by chance, and I don't want to die poor.

Let me sell you a story boy if you like it I'll sell you some more.

Hansel and Gretel moved back in that gingerbread house.

Rumor says they put a hit on the witch and paid off the door mouse.

Who was the janitor at Mad Hatters factory right next door.

That's where they make hydrogen bombs to deter another war.

            I know these stories used to be for free, but they were fairy tales.

            Things aren't the way they used to be, now everything's for sale,

            back home.

Jack and Jill built a house way up on that hill.

But I don't think Jack ever fully recovered from that nasty spill.

He's a little slow and makes minimum wage at Hatter's factory.

And it's all that Jill can do to keep up with his laundry.

Old King Cole had a stroke you know, it's been a few years back.

But Humpty's much better now, they sealed up all his cracks.

He's a miracle of science, he's healthy and he's slim.

His left arm is an appliance but he works out in the gym.

The Japanese came back last week and bought Miss Moppet's place.

They made her an offer she couldn't refuse you should have seen her face.

That leaves just me I guess, I need a place to spend the night.

The bank repossessed my house last week and I don't have the money to fight.

            I know these stories used to be for free, but they were fairy tales.

            Things aren't the way they used to be, now everything's for sale,

            back home with Mother Goose, things aren't so loose,

            back home....back home.....back home,

            It's fairy tales no more...........

            Back home.